


Punch Drunk In Love With You (Drunk on You)

by Saintmakoto



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, One Shot, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 09:58:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5535626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saintmakoto/pseuds/Saintmakoto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you gotta wake up, face the music, and figure out if your crush is an alien, once and for all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Punch Drunk In Love With You (Drunk on You)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [whoalev](https://archiveofourown.org/users/whoalev/gifts).



Sometimes you gotta wake up, face the music, and figure out if your crush is an alien, once and for all.

 

It was finally Friday. Finally finally _finally_ Friday. Lev deserved a prize for making it through this week, between the volleyball practices and, well, _school_ in general. Normally Lev has a lot of energy, but this week had been especially gruelling for him. He had been sick at the beginning of the week and had been trying to balance catching up with what he missed with studying for the big math test he wrote today.

Because while Lev was not totally _distraught_ with the idea of sacrificing things (namely school work) for volleyball practice, his parents and _Yaku_ were.

But today, Lev resolved, today he would plant himself down after dinner and watch some mind-numbing television. Lev had recently become texting budding with Aobujohsai’s captain, Oikawa. The result of this was that Lev had a list of programs that Oikawa had recommended him. And at this point, Lev was positively ecstatic to start watching them and well…

It had been a long week.

 

After dinner, Lev’s mother outfitted him in his bed with extra blankets and snacks. Thanking her, Lev got comfortable and readied himself. The first show seemed calm enough, titled “Aliens in the Ordinary”.

The show starts off with a shot of a city from a pedestrian’s point of view, the world moving in slow motion around the camera. A voiceover with a calm voice starts talking about how people are always on the lookout for aliens from outer space and lists examples. But then the motion in the frame stops, except one person keeps moving; towards the camera.

“But,” starts the narrator. “What if the aliens are already on our planet, in our homes?”

Lev can feel the tension starting to build and no amount of preparation could have stopped the scream that Lev lets out as the person on screen _rips off their skin_ to revel a visage of none other than, an _alien_.

From that moment on, Lev is constantly on the edge of his seat until the end of the program, raptly watching and absorbing every word of the narrator.

By the end of the night Lev has established three things:

  1. Aliens could be anywhere, though they aren’t common enough to be everywhere (Lev could have told you that, after all _Lev_ isn’t an alien, haha ha h a, oh god what if Lev is an alien but the aliens have brainwashed him to think he isn’t??? Note to self for a later date: find out if you are an alien)
  2. Aliens might have various strengths, but they also have weaknesses
  3. Aliens are almost always _short_.



 

And it’s the last one that chills Lev to the bone, because you know who is short???? YAKU. Yaku is _so_ short, and Lev has always suspected it was abnormal, but he never considered it _out-worldly_. That is, until now.

Lev resolves to investigate and find out the truth, if Yaku is truly an alien or not. It doesn’t escape Lev’s attention that Yaku is not the only abnormally short person for their age that he knows but. The other options aren’t as appealing.

Exhibit A: _Kenma_. A setter for Nekoma. Short. Strange. Frightening. All of which are symptoms that suggest he is an alien BUT Kenma, as earlier established, is frightening. What if he captured Lev if Lev discovered that Kenma was an alien!!! That would be absolutely Cat-o-strophic, because Lev didn’t doubt that if Kenma was an alien, the rest of the Nekoma team would help him in his nefarious alien-ness.

Yaku was _safe_. Even if he didn’t always show it, he cared for Lev. Because of that Lev preferred to see if Yaku was an alien before anyone else. Even if Yaku was an alien, he wouldn’t capture Lev if Lev found out, right?

(Right.)

 

And so Lev started his alien plan.

Aliens 101: An Alien cannot survive for more than 6 hours without consuming blood.

(And Lev was 80% sure that was werewolves or vampires or both but the program said it was aliens, and it aired on TV at one point, so everything it said _had_ to be true)

The simplest way to prove this was to spend 6 hours with Yaku and monitor him to make sure he didn’t drink any blood. And if he didn’t, and was still alive by the end of it, then Yaku was not an alien.

Simple.

 

And now all Lev had to do was… invite Yaku out. On a date-but-not-actually-date because he was trying to figure out if Yaku was an _alien_ or not.

No better time like the present, Lev reasoned as he picked up his phone.

“Hello?”

“HI! Yaku! This is Lev, and I was just wondering if you were busy tomorrow, because if you’re _not_ then, wanna go. Someplace. With me!”

“Oh, sure. Did you want to practice spiking? I’m not sure if the gym will be open tomorrow, since it’s Sunday.”

Lev jolted back. Tomorrow was Sunday? But today was _Friday_. Looking out the window, Lev realized it was morning already.

 _Oops_ , Lev thought to himself sheepishly.

“Lev? Still there?”

“YEAH. Uh, I was actually thinking of, you know, going into town and maybe just hanging around. With the two of us.” Lev couldn’t risk other people distracting him from his task of monitoring Yaku. More than that, the idea of going out, just him and Yaku, gave Lev a _feeling_ in the pit of his stomach. It also made him strangely nervous, but at least now he seemed less likely to say something stupid that would warrant Yaku hitting him.

“Ah, okay, that sounds, okay, yeah that sounds ok- good. It sounds good,” replied Yaku. Lev could swear that Yaku sounded flustered, but Lev of all people knew that Yaku didn’t _do_ flustered. Yaku continued in a rush of words that Lev barely caught. “You know what Lev, I have to go, but I’ll text you, okay, bye!”

Lev was left with a funny look on his face as he listened to the dial tone (his mother would swear that Lev had a goofy smile stuck on his face for the rest of the day, but it was the _lighting_ definitely, probably).

A whole day with _Yaku_. Alone _(ish)._

 

Lev was practically vibrating with excitement as he waited on the predetermined corner that Yaku had suggested.

“Hey! Lev! Wake up!” called a familiar voice, bringing Lev out of his thoughts.

 “Sorry Yaku, you must’ve been so short I couldn’t se-“ and the next words that Lev had just vanished out of his mind. Because Yaku in the uniform, Yaku in volleyball garb, those Lev could deal with, Lev had slowly become accustomed to them and built up an immunity to.

But Yaku in black, slim fitting jeans that offset the chunky coat he wore? And a _beanie_?

 

SUPER EFFECTIVE, LEV TAKES A CRITICAL HIT

 

“You look really good,” blurts out Lev, without the permission of his own mind. Lev winces, braces for a hit that never comes. When Lev opens his eyes, instead of outrage, he sees Yaku looking at the ground with his hands stuck in his coat. Lev notices that Yaku’s ears are _pink_ , and all Lev wants to do right now if pick up Yaku and twirl him around, but that would definitely earn a smack.

Yaku lifts his eyes after a moment and looks at Lev through his lashes and says, “Thanks. You too.”

 

ANOTHER CRITICAL HIT

LEV HP: 1

 

After another second Yaku seems to have composed himself and asks what is in store for the two of them today.

Lev is confident in his plans, for all the critical eye that Yaku gives him.

Movies, lunch, and a walk around the stores downtown. A perfect plan.

And for once, it all goes according to keikaku (TN: keikaku means plan)

And it’s a perfect day. That is, until the end of it. And that’s where things go a little off track.

“Thanks Lev, I had fun today,” says Yaku as he scratches the back of his neck and looks up at Lev.

And Lev kind of wants to leave the day like this, with smiles and warmth. But his guilt has been gnawing away at his conscience all day. Because Yaku didn’t consume any blood and he must be human, but that wasn’t really on the foreground of Lev’s mind today.

“Yaku! The thing is, that, well, Ikindofthoughtyouwereanalienandhadtomoniteryou-“

Yaku looks at Lev with concern and grabs his arms.

“Slow down Lev, I can barely understand what you’re saying. I hear something about… an alien? What’s that about?” 

And to anyone else, Lev would’ve just laughed it off or ran away, but Yaku’s face is quickly losing all glee it had a moment ago and it’s breaking Lev’s heart piece by piece.

And so Lev begins his explanation, or perhaps, _confession_ would be a more accurate term.

“- and of course by the end of the day I realized that you _weren’t_ an alien, for sure for sure, but then I realized I really liked it today, and I kind of wish it was a date but it isn’t.”

Yaku had been simmering quietly as he listened to Lev’s explanation.

“You’re. An _IDIOT_.” Yaku exclaimed as he hit Lev once Lev had finished his explanation. 

“Sorry, sorry, sorry!!”

Yaku stops hitting Lev for a second and he looks up at Lev with an unapologetic and unyielding expression.

“I,” begins Yaku, “I thought it was a date. Though I guess it wasn’t. But, I think we can do a redo. It seems like we both want it. Meet me here, same place, same time, next week. Okay?”

And it takes a bit for Lev to process all the words and their _implications_ , but eventually he does. And what he gleams from that lightly fries his mind to a point where all Lev can do is nod simply in confirmation.

And finally _finally_ , Yaku has a smile back on his face, though it’s balancing more on the side of a smirk.

“I’ll see you around Lev.” He says simply before walking away.

And once Yaku turns the corner and is out of sight, the emotions come crashing down on Lev.

“YES!”

LEV KO

LEV OFFICIALLY A GONER FOR YAKU

_fin_

 

**Author's Note:**

> MERRY CHRISTMAS MARI YOU NERD. This was a Secret Santa gift for you, and I hope you enjoy it!


End file.
